Saturday, May 17, 2008

As Close to Cowboy as I Come

Get ready for Ali's Roundup, the rootin'est tootin'est destroyer of all things weed! That's right, I've been battling my new nemesis, Morning Glory, with the aid of RoundUp--it's no cowboy roundup or Woody's Roundup, but it's as close to cowboy as I'll get!

Ok, so why is it called "morning glory" anyway? Seriously, that stuff is not glorious in ANY way! It is pure, intense, nasty evil. I mean, what does the name "morning glory" call to mind? An awe-inspiring, beautiful, glorious thing of the early day. Instead, with this pesky weed, you get a creeping, smothering, choking weed that will inundate your lawn, garden, and life in a matter of days. 
This fall, I tried pulling it. I pulled out each little tendril from my beds. Two weeks later, they were back, thicker and fuller than before. It turns out that this tenacious weed sends roots up to 30 feet deep and hundreds of feet long. Unless you get out every bit of the root, it just sends more tendrils to invade your yard. The seeds have such tough exteriors that they can survive for 50 years before sprouting and producing noxious invaders. 
Seriously, if Satan were a plant, he would be morning glory. Nice, unimposing name that lulls you into calm rather than arousing your instincts to seek and destroy. Looks so unassuming that you don't worry about it...until it's climbed halfway up your fence, choked all of your tomato plants at the base of the stem, and ingested your 2 year old. 
Fortunately, RoundUp (or the knockoff, TotalKill by Ortho, which I started using once I realized you get 10 times the product for 3/4 the price) has been invented. It is not a quick fix...I've been spraying the stuff since we got home from Oregon at the beginning of April and I've only got the front beds mostly clear. The HUGE garden plot is on it's 4th round of spraying and is still fighting back. I just hope I can clear the plot with enough time to plant our tomatoes and pumpkins! 
This is my battle, my quest, my dream: a garden where plants are free to grow and thrive, that will not be subjected to an early, painful death due to morning glory. 
And also, chocolate that doesn't go straight to the hips. 
I'm not sure which quest is more unrealistic.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know that with Black Jack Vigue and Shay, a.k.a. "Side Winder Shorty" by your side you can do it!

Unknown said...

Once you've got yours under control can you come work on mine? I'm not fast with the sprayer.

Hannah said...

Would you believe that my daughter actually wanted to buy Morning Glory seeds??? You know, to grow the colorful ones. So we did of course. They are dwarfs ... that means 1/2 the Roundup to remove them. Hey, it's not my garden, right?

Tyler V said...

Growing up, my best friend and I planted a garden. We were always a little confused as to why her parents wouldn't let us plant morning glory. Of course, the ones you buy at the store aren't the vermin that the weeds we have are (and they are much, much prettier), but they are cousins. I'm sure those are much nicer, although invasive like strawberries or mint.

The Vigue's Wild Ride said...

my neighbor is a botanist. he said you can't kill morning glory. he did tell us to mix roundup and something else for your best chance at RASPUTIN. if you're interested i'll find out what it is.